Motherhood

5 Kisses for You!

My favorite spot in my home (quite possibly the planet) is my glider in my daughters room.

Bedtime for my daughter has become by far one of my favorite times. I’m sure I’ve written about it (maybe even a few times) before. I’m not counting the struggle it is to get her pjs on part; but the rocking part. I’ve always been very strict with her bedtime routine and for almost 11 months now we haven’t changed it. The great part of that is she sleeps through the night and is pretty happy most of the day. The down side is sometimes life tries to interfere and makes the ritual more challenging due to outings, family visits, trips, etc. When we don’t follow the plan she doesn’t sleep so well through the night.

But when I’m rocking her to sleep it is just heaven. It’s dark, calm, and quiet. We use a sound machine set to the noise of rain. I also use a fan in her room pointed away from her so that there is air flow through the night. But for the most part it is quiet. I find myself so relaxed at that moment. It may have been a stressful day and maybe when I’m done putting her to bed my stressful day will continue; but for that moment in time I am at peace. I don’t know if I’ve ever really felt that feeling before. Pure, honest peace. It’s quite nice I must say. I don’t worry about who may be texting/calling, what’s on tv, the endless list of chores I still have to do. I honestly think about nothing other than how happy I am to be in that moment. I get to feel this way every day!

On to the topic of this blog entry; 5 kisses.

Every night while I’m rocking my daughter to sleep I give her 5 kisses before I lay her down to bed. Here’s why:
1. A kiss from me; mommy!
2. A kiss from daddy!
3. A kiss from her grandparents, because they live far away from us and I know if they were here they’d kiss her goodnight!
4. A kiss from everyone who never got the chance to meet her! This one I hold dear to me because I always seem to think of my granny when I’m rocking her. How I wish she was still alive to see her, hold her, and love her. I know she is watching over her and me but it’d still be nice to have her here physically. Maybe she is with us in that moment because I seem to always think of her. At least I’d like to think that. In addition to my granny, I wish my husbands sister could still be here to meet her niece as well. I never got to meet her but from pictures they look alike in many ways. This kiss is for them and all our other family members who are no longer with us.
5. An extra kiss; because there is no reason to stop at 4! I guess it’s my way of finishing out our wonderful day and for her to sleep well.

I have done this every night for as long as I can remember. When she is older I will continue this and I’ll tell her all about why I kiss her 5 times before bed. Since becoming a mom I truly appreciate the little, simple things in everything because it’s all those little things that end up being so big in meaning!

Motherhood

“You know when you know”

How many times in our lives have we heard or said the above phrase “you’ll just know when you know”?

Earlier today I was talking to a new mom of a beautiful 3 month old and we were discussing bedtime rituals and the struggles with that. All moms (and dads) out there you know what I’m talking about. She asked me “how do you know when it’s time to put your daughter to bed”?….Let me back up for a minute and explain our bedtime ritual… We start by having bath time and I always give my daughter a little massage in the water l. We keep things pretty mellow the whole time. After bath time I rub lotion on her and put on her pjs. I give her to daddy for him to say goodnight, hug, and give a kiss goodnight (she can get a little fussy during this part because I’ve walked out of her sight and well that’s pretty traumatic for her these days lol). While daddy and her are having their moment I get a small bottle ready. Her and I then go to her room and I rocked her gently while she has her bottle. I keep her room dark with no lights and just the sound machine playing (rain sounds). I don’t talk to her I just hold her. After her bottle I rock her until she’s ready to be laid down in her crib.

My friend has a similar routine but she said when she lays her daughter down she just cries and takes forever to fall asleep so she asked how do I know when it’s time.

I had to take a minute to think about it because I didn’t know how to answer her. Even my husband had had problems getting her to relax and go to bed. I finally determined the only answer I could give she wouldn’t like. The answer: “You just know when you know”. I put my daughter to bed every night (something I’m kinda stingy about because I absolutely love to… I’m working on letting my husband hehe) so I know my daughters body language. I’m with her all day everyday so I know her very well. Sometimes rocking her takes 5 minutes of and other times maybe 30. I don’t rush her bedtime, even if my favorite show is about to come in or if I have to go to the bathroom (this is what my husband struggles with). I just relax and let her do her thing. I personally think that’s important in anything with my daughter…. Be present. I’ve come to thoroughly enjoy that dark, quiet time just rocking her. Just her and I.

I explained to my friend there comes a moment when my daughter is not quite asleep but is still and just peaceful. When this moment happens I pause and embrace that moment because I know these days won’t last forever, and then I lay her in her crib. From there she falls completely asleep within a couple minutes.

I certainly hope I was a little help to her because I know I got so much help and advice from others so it’d be nice to pay it forward.

Looking back to day one of finding out I was pregnant I haven’t stopped reading articles, researching theories, etc…but I’ve made every decision for me, my daughter, and my family based on how I feel and living by the phrase “i’ll know when I know”.

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